When I sat down to write this post, my goal was to chronicle my recent vacation down in SD. Looking through our pictures, I realize now that our ability to photograph our food is inversely proportional to the amount we drink.
We drink a lot.
I was hoping I would find pictures of Thanksgiving II, but they are scarce. Sgt. Baconator, sir, I hope that the hard plastic Jäger sponge that is your phone captured some of that glory.
For now, it looks like I have Fried Chicken night pictures. Friends, Eatfiends, Larbs, Turkeys and Hotdogs, I give you Fried Chicken Night.
I'm not sure what this green stuff is. I'm told it's called a vegetable. I'm not sure how to pronounce that word. Is the "g" soft? ve-het-able? Either way, I have a strange inkling to start the reactor core.
Marc (who, until he adopts an Eatfiend name, shall henceforth be referred to as Hotdog) decided to do some Fried Chicken! Hotdog was looking to do a traditional buttermilk dip to start it out, but Sgt. Baconator drank all the Buttermilk, so Hotdog used Greek Yogurt and Hot sauce. Non-traditional, but it worked really well. He then dredged it in some sort of breading, the ingredients to which are an Ancient Cambodian Secret. Did I mention that he fried it in Bacon Grease?
The first batch came out Golden Crispy. The thighs were really well done and the skin was ri-dick. To quote Nick Kroll, "You know who loves fried chicken? Black people. You know who else loves fried chicken? EVERYBODY! 'CAUSE THAT SHIT IS DELICIOUS!"
Chicken Porn.
Full glory, with an Au Jus on the left (For fuck knows what, Sgt. Baconator probably beerbonged it) and some mashed 'Taters on the top right. Christian's Steak and non-meat accoutrements on the bottom right.
We BBQed that night for fear of the alternative, which is, of course, death. Stuffed pork loin. Billy also did some Chreemps, which we were too busy with heavy drinking to take pictures of.
The next morning was a hungover shitshow! Hot dogs with beans, jalapenos, onions, and canned cheese! Why didn't we fry these in bacon grease too?
As a preview of what I hope is to come (Sarge, I'm looking at you), I present to the Larb and Eatfiend community the BACON TURKEY! This is before it cooked. The bacon hardened into an armor of sorts, but one that would not protect against an Eatfiend. It also dripped gorgeous bacon fat into the turkey parts, further contributing to our collective heart disease.
I made some Gyoza from scratch that day. Dressed one up all purty-like for the blog. Filling is Shitake mushroom, pork, garlic, scallions and bok choi.
Then Sgt. Baconator got drunk, threw a knife through some water piping in his garage, and flipped over an asshole table like, 3 times. Below is a rare photo of a Larb in his natural habitat. This is something on par with photos of a snow leopard, as the Larb typically does not occupy habitats with enough light for a camera to operate. The blackness of his soul, and his ass, absorbs all light emanating from a flash.
See you guys for Larbsmas and New Year's Eat!!!
Eat
Fucking
Fiend
